Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Para WHAT???? Part one of several... :-)


- Paraprosdokian -

A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect. For this reason, it is extremely popular among comedians and satirists. Groucho Marx was a master at these - like this one: "I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in there, I'll never know." I hope you enjoy these! ;-)

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.



Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.


The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.


If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.


We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.


Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.


The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.


How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?


Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.


Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR".?!


I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.


Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.


You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive again.


The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!


Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.


I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my foot.


Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.


There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.


You're never too old to learn something stupid.

I'll see if I can scare up some more...I LOVE these!!! ;-)

Have A Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy

4 comments:

Cris, Artist in Oregon said...

These are really great but I think the one that got the biggest laugh from me was ..the second mouse gets the cheese. I had to think about that a second. LOL Yes do post more. :))

OregonArtGuy said...

Hi Cris! I like that one too - and I had to think about it for a minute myself....I'm wondering about the 3rd mouse..... ;-)

ArtistUnplugged said...

Hey....too long since I have visited your site of kicks and giggles!!!! Love these and am going to really work to try to remember that word! (To amaze my friends). Seen any aliens lately your way, besides in the mirror I mean. ;)

OregonArtGuy said...

Hi Teresa - sorry it took so long to respond... Good to see you!!! I have a really hard time getting to all my friends - thank you so much for your comment and for stopping by....you are my favorite unplugged artist... ;-)