Thursday, October 29, 2009

WHEN GRANDMA GOES TO COURT

I thought this was pretty good - hope you like it! :

Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi Grandma a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, “Mrs. Jones, do you know me?” She responded, “Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I’ve known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you’ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.”
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, “Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?”
Again she replied, “Why yes, I do. I’ve known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He’s lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.”
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, “If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I’ll send you both to the electric chair.” :-}


Have a Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy

4 comments:

S-V-H said...

That's a good one, yes!!!! I liked it- and hubby too :)
Susanne

OregonArtGuy said...

Hi Sue! Glad you liked it! Good to see you!:-}
~Bill~

Cris, Artist in Oregon said...

Heard this before and liked it again. Got my computer fixed. It was a mess. It was about to crash too. Called in the Nerds on call and walla 3 1/2 hours later and minus a few bucks it runs like new. When it comes back I will be on more. lol.

OregonArtGuy said...

Hi Cris!!! Good to see you! Glad you got your computer fixed - I have to do something with mine - the sound quit - oh well....
talk with you soon! :-}
~Bill~