World’s Best Blond Joke?

An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”


The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:


1. The bartender is a blond girl with a baseball bat.


2. The bouncer is a blond girl.


3. I’m a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blond woman with a black belt in karate.


4. The woman sitting next to me is blond and a professional weight lifter.


5. The lady to your right is blond and a professional wrestler.


Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?’”


The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, “No, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times.” :-)

Have A Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy

Married for 39 years......

OregonArtGuy (Bill) and his wife (Pat) have been married for 39 years as of today - June 4th! :-)

Fishing License :-)

A redneck was stopped by a SCDNR game warden at Lake Hartwell recently with two ice chests full of fish. He was leaving a cove well known for its fishing.

The game warden asked the man, 'Do you have a license to catch those fish?'

'Naw, sir', replied the redneck. 'I ain't got none of them there licenses. You must understand, these here are my pet fish.'

'Pet fish?'

'Yeah. Every night, I take these here fish down to the lake and let 'em swim 'round for awhile. Then, when I whistle, they jump right back into these here ice chests and I take 'em home.'

'That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that.'

The redneck looked at the warden for a moment and then said, 'It's the truth Mr. Government Man. I'll show ya. It really works.'

'OK', said the warden. 'I've got to see this!'

The redneck poured the fish into the lake and stood and waited.

After several minutes, the warden says, 'Well?'

'Well, what?', says the redneck.

The warden says, 'When are you going to call them back?'

'Call who back?'

'The FISH', replied the warden!

'What fish?', replied the redneck. ..................... ;-)

Have A Great Day!

Seeya,

OregonArtGuy!

Ya Might Just Be A Redneck........ ;-)

Top Ten indicators that "Ya Might Just be a Redneck" :

#10. A little rain doesn't spoil the fishing...

#9. You carry your front porch with you...

#8. You wear a shirt like this for your engagement picture...

(and your fiancé looks like she is 12)

#7. Your wedding picture looked like this.

#6. And your wedding cake looked like this...




#5. Your doghouse looks like this...

#4. Your pickup looks like this...

#3. You have a deer's butt for a door bell...

#2. You don't need a lake to do a little skiing...

And the #1 indicator that you might just be a redneck is........

if you were quoted in the local paper saying...

Hope you enjoyed these :-)
Have A Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy

Tulips!

Some tulip photos from around my yard - hope you enjoy them....
(Click on the image to enlarge it)

Have a Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy