These are unbelieveable artwork! I can't even get a good point with an electric sharpener......Hope you enjoy them!
Have a Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
A Riding Lawnmower......
My Wife always wanted a riding lawn mower.
She works all day and was always tired when she came home from work and thought that a riding lawn mower would help her get the yard work done quicker so she would have more time for the chores inside the house.
SO, being the handy sort of guy that I am, I made her a riding lawn mower.
I guess I thought she would squeal with delight or something and give me a big hug.
To this day I have never been able to understand
why some women are so hard to please ......
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She works all day and was always tired when she came home from work and thought that a riding lawn mower would help her get the yard work done quicker so she would have more time for the chores inside the house.
SO, being the handy sort of guy that I am, I made her a riding lawn mower.
I guess I thought she would squeal with delight or something and give me a big hug.
To this day I have never been able to understand
why some women are so hard to please ......
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Ya just can't please some people....
Have A Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Star QuarterBack :-)
NOTE - Please don't be shocked or take offense at this post - that is not my purpose. You'll see what I mean at the end. I apologize if it causes anyone any grief - Bill
The coach had put together the perfect team for the Oakland Raiders The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan . In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away.
KABOOM!
He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.
KA-BLOOEY!
Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.
BULLS-EYE!
"I've got to get this guy!" Coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"
So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And the Raiders go on to win the Super Bowl.
The young Afghan is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.
"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"
"I don't want to talk to you, the old Muslim woman says."You are not my son!"
"I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. "I've won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."
"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn’t get raped!" The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,
"I will never forgive you for making us move to Oakland !!
I hope you enjoyed this.....
Have a Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy
The coach had put together the perfect team for the Oakland Raiders The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan . In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away.
KABOOM!
He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.
KA-BLOOEY!
Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.
BULLS-EYE!
"I've got to get this guy!" Coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"
So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And the Raiders go on to win the Super Bowl.
The young Afghan is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.
"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"
"I don't want to talk to you, the old Muslim woman says."You are not my son!"
"I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. "I've won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."
"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn’t get raped!" The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,
"I will never forgive you for making us move to Oakland !!
I hope you enjoyed this.....
Have a Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy
Saturday, July 17, 2010
World’s Best Blond Joke?
An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blond girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blond girl.
3. I’m a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blond woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blond and a professional weight lifter.
5. The lady to your right is blond and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?’”
The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, “No, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times.” :-)
Have A Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy
The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
1. The bartender is a blond girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blond girl.
3. I’m a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blond woman with a black belt in karate.
4. The woman sitting next to me is blond and a professional weight lifter.
5. The lady to your right is blond and a professional wrestler.
Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?’”
The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, “No, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times.” :-)
Have A Great Day!
Seeya,
OregonArtGuy
Friday, June 4, 2010
Married for 39 years......
OregonArtGuy (Bill) and his wife (Pat) have been married for 39 years as of today - June 4th! :-)
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